July 13 - it was a beautiful, summer afternoon and the view from the helicopter window was breathtaking. A rich green canopy of trees blanketed the earth with serene beauty. My husband had purchased a helicopter ride for me for my birthday. That day, my two daughters joined me and we flew over Ada, Rockford, and downtown Grand Rapids.

As I took in the view from 10,000 feet, I noticed how peaceful and beautiful our city looked. At the same time, I was acutely aware of the pain the Grand Rapids was experiencing. Just six days before, one person’s act of horrific violence took the lives of seven people, and then his own, and left family, friends and an entire community grief-stricken, stunned, and broken. My heart grieved with the families and friends who lost loved ones. I was haunted by the question, “What could we have done differently to have prevented this terrible act?”

As a society, we are uncomfortable with domestic violence – it is easier for us to label things as substance abuse, mental illness, or anger issues. Domestic violence is none of these things. Many people who have mental health problems, who abuse substances, or have anger management issues do not abuse people whom they have committed to love. These things might exasperate domestic violence, but they do not create it.

Domestic violence - plain and simple - is about one person’s need to have power and control over another person. History of violence is the key indicator of future violence, not substance abuse or mental health issues. I remain grateful to Mayor Heartwell, who named in his first press release the events of July 7 a horrific act of domestic violence, for that is exactly what it was.

So what can we do? Safe Haven can not prevent acts of violence. We need your help! To create a community that is truly free from domestic violence, we all need to do our part.

After the tragic murders of July 7, the number of crises calls we receive has dramatically increased. The level of fear among victims of domestic abuse has sky-rocketed. As a community, we are acutely aware of this issue right now, but we need to go further.

I challenge all of us to find the courage to reach out to someone who we think might be living in an abusive situation. I challenge all of us to call the police when we hear or see domestic violence – it is a crime like any other. And I challenge all of us to support victims of abuse as they struggle to get back on their feet after suffering significant emotional, physical, and spiritual trauma.

I understand this is not going to be comfortable for everyone. We would love to soar above societal brokenness so we don’t have to see or feel the pain of it; but I challenge each of us to do the right thing. We need a united message that says it is NEVER OK to abuse another person, EVER!!

From 10,000 feet, everything looks pretty and tranquil. It’s when we look closer – when we dare to get involved that we see the world in focus – as it truly is. Even from the ground level, I believe in our common ability to do what’s right. I believe most of us want a world where we are respected and have hope for the future. It’s time to come down from the helicopter and walk the streets with open eyes and open hearts. Let’s commit to each other to help create a healthy community where our children can grow up to be all they were created to be.