Dealing with Dissapointment

A few months ago, I opened my email on a Monday morning to an urgent email from one of Resonate’s missionaries.  She was planning to host a group from a church on a Witness Trip the following week.  But she and the local organization she serves with followed all the rules of the host country, including getting authorization from the government for the group to enter the country, and it was denied without explanation.  

By the time we got this news, we’d spent more than a year in conversation with the church leadership about the trip.  We’d had zoom calls, coordinated dates for the participants, completed paperwork, raised funds, bought the plane tickets and had orientation meetings.  All to be stopped by one phone call that gave us no recourse.  It was a surprise to all of us–it is very rare for our volunteers to be denied entry to a country.  The group was disappointed.  The missionary was disappointed.  I was disappointed.  

I’ve been in other situations where there was disappointment, and I’ve noticed what we do with our disappointment changes the type of experience we have.  In this situation, although it was hard, everyone managed the disappointment well, so we didn’t make the hard situation worse with our reactions.  

We prioritized having good communication, which included talking with people (via zoom or phone) in addition to email.  The group met in person, and then with us on zoom, and in both of those gatherings, we made space to share and process emotions, to lament the loss and let go of what could have been.  

I also had to make space for myself to be able to care for others well.  I quickly realized I needed to be extra gentle with myself, because this situation was rubbing a tender spot in my own story.  So I looked for ways to give my heart a little space to name the loss, to shed some tears, and to move a little more slowly for a few days.

At another time when ministry was disappointing, a pastor shared 1 Corinthians 15:58 as a verse that he had hung onto during a season of disappointment: “Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.”  Now I come back to this verse (and the Porter’s Gate song based on this verse) in times of disappointment.  May you also trust that whether your work is going well or is disappointing, your labor is not in vain.