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The main problem, and most common problem I see with so many pastors on this issue, is one of language.  Your story about Jason as a "homosexual" fails to mention what that means.  The CRC's position is that to have same sex attraction isn't the main issues.  It is the engaging in homosexual acts or relationships that include them that is problematic.  You keep conflating the 2 things and using "hospitality" as a run-around.  This is unintellectual and it is certainly NOT helpful for those that have same sex attractions and are trying to figure out what God wants from them. As an ethnic minority from the inner city, I have experienced this many times from white CRC pastors.  They'll speak to me like I'm stupid and uneducated (especially if we disagree) and it's always ok for me to fail. I don't want to feel ok failing.  I want to know the pathway towards success in God's eyes.  I have worked with trans people that were so frustrated with the cowardice of their church to face their struggles head on for the sake of coming off as loving (which for some reason is only defined as being nice).  Some of these people prefer truth to comfort.  And if you're "hospitality" isn't even trying to find some truth, we don't experience it as hospitality.  We experience it as fake.  

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