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Ken Nydam on July 15, 2012

In reply to by anonymous_stub (not verified)

I do think that a spiritual director could fulfil much of what I sugest as that relationship is built around honesty and shaped by Gospel grace. But it is also a very confidential relationship and would lack any teeth for accoutability or to bring the elders into play if needed. Supervision is not mentoring although it can certainly be very "mentoringish". The Church Order is written so that pastors and/or congregations have a recourse when there are incompatibility concerns between them. It is there for the benefit of both parties for their protection. Elders, being, in general, ill equipped for the kind of supervision that I suggest, need the help of a professional who will supervise empathically as well as protect both parties when things "go wierd." I dont think a SD could do that. We would all like to think that pastors and congregations would be able to work eveything out in love, but the data shows, unfortunately, that it doesn't happen enough. I don't know if my suggestion is the best one, but I hope for some action on this in the future. This idea is all about prevention and building flourishing ministries.

Ken

Ken Nydam on July 16, 2012

In reply to by anonymous_stub (not verified)

Thanks for the feedback, John. I understand that my suggestion is a big leap and a supervisor being able to convene the elders would require some serious thought as to what is, in fact, the relationship between this supervisor and the elders. We have had our discussion about church bishops and we don't want to go there either. And does the supervisor's role diminish if the elders do not support him on an issue that was brought to their attention by him? I only know that too many times, the current official bodies, (elders or classis) do not get involved until it is too late when too much hurt has already passed over the dam and the window of prevention has passed and it is time for damage control and discipline. A pastor being in supervision could do so much prevention so that the concern never has to go to the elders or classis. As a novice social worker, I looked forward to my supervision sessions. I came with so many questions and with a feeling of safety because I knew my supervisor what rooting for me. I was also so glad to have a place to bring issues or clinical decisions that could have serious ramifications for myself and those I counseled. I was also relieved that I if I blew it, there was a structure in place that could salvage the situation. I know that pastors are used to and expected to be the "experts" on what God says to his people and in church leadership issues. But we all have to "work those tasks out with fear and trembling" for God working in us to accomplish his will, still has many blind spots and personal ego challenges which are always better delt with in a collective way. We all need a mirror to see ourselves as we really are and we all need a "magic mirror"
to speak truth into us, truth that we cannot see for ourselves.

Ken Nydam on July 16, 2012

In reply to by anonymous_stub (not verified)

Yes, I was once part of such a group too and it was very helpful and is certainly one viable option to address the need I am trying to identify. These groups are typically done in more urban places where there is a cluster of churches and the clinical assistance is available. Not so true in rural areas. I think Hank Bosma LMSW is doing something like this in the GR area. When trust develops in such a group which may have to be a closed group for that trust to grow and continue, a pastor can take risks in disclosing his struggles and be assured that it is held in confidence lest it get back to parishioners who would be mortified that they are being talked about by the area clergy even though names are not mentioned. That such groups exist in spite of the risks demonstrates that there is a need that is important enough to take risks to satisfy.

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