Why Respectful Dialogue Matters

Our community exists to connect people across the Christian Reformed Church and beyond: to encourage one another, share wisdom, and engage faithfully with the questions and challenges of ministry, faith, and life. Because we come from different contexts and experiences, disagreement is inevitable. Respectful dialogue helps ensure that disagreement becomes an opportunity for learning rather than division.

Respectful dialogue isn’t about avoiding hard conversations. It’s about how we engage in them. And we want to engage with care for one another, humility about our own perspectives, and faithfulness to Christ.

Notably, this is a discussion about the specific guidelines on the Network, but these general principles apply to all sorts of conversations outside of the Network, as well. 

Why Respectful Dialogue Matters

As Christians, we believe every person is created in the image of God. This conviction shapes how we speak and listen. Scripture calls us to speak the truth in love and to pursue peace and unity within the body of Christ. Our words are not neutral; they reflect our hearts and bear witness to the gospel we proclaim.

Respectful dialogue matters because it:

• Affirms human dignity, recognizing that the people we disagree with are still beloved by God.
• Creates a safer space for participation, especially for those who may already feel hesitant to speak or share their experiences.
• Encourages learning and growth, allowing us to hear perspectives that may challenge or deepen our understanding.
• Strengthens Christian witness, showing that faithful disagreement can coexist with grace, humility, and love.

When conversations turn hostile or dismissive, they stop being about ideas and start causing harm. Respectful dialogue doesn’t limit meaningful conversation. Instead, it makes meaningful conversation possible.

What Respectful Dialogue Looks Like

In practice, respectful dialogue means that our posts and comments:

• Focus on ideas, not people. Disagreement should address the topic at hand rather than questioning someone’s intelligence, character, faith, or motives.
• Use courteous and thoughtful language. Strong convictions can be expressed clearly without being cruel or demeaning.
• Stay on topic and contribute constructively. Comments should add clarity, insight, or perspective rather than repeating the same arguments or escalating conflict.
• Demonstrate humility. Respectful dialogue includes listening carefully, acknowledging complexity, and recognizing that none of us has a complete picture.
• Are honest and transparent. Posts should be truthful and shared under one’s real name, reflecting accountability and integrity.

Respectful dialogue also means remembering why this space exists: to build up the church, support ministry, and encourage faithful engagement, not to win arguments or prove superiority.

What Respectful Dialogue Is Not

Respectful dialogue does not include:

• Name-calling or personal attacks. Language such as calling someone “stupid” or “a fool” undermines conversation and violates the dignity of others.
• Telling others to remove their posts. Directing people to delete their comments shifts the focus from dialogue to control and does not foster healthy engagement.
• Dominating the discussion. Repeated posting or argumentative back-and-forth can crowd out other voices and reduce opportunities for broader participation.
• Minimizing lived experience. Especially when topics touch on marginalization or harm, dismissing or trivializing others’ stories damages trust and community.
• Posting for personal gain. Using the platform primarily to advertise, fundraise, promote outside projects, or drive traffic elsewhere shifts the purpose of the community from shared engagement to self-interest.
  • This includes re-posting content from external blogs of Substacks, which brings in copyright law complications! 

A Word About Strong Emotions

It’s normal to feel strong or even heated reactions when discussing contentious topics. Passion often reflects deep care, conviction, or personal experience. Before posting, though, it can be helpful to pause and ask:

• How might this sound to someone who disagrees with me?
• Does this response invite conversation or shut it down?
• Are my words reflective of kindness, patience, and respect, even in disagreement?
• Is what I am going to say truly reflecting the Gospel?

Taking a moment to reflect and revise your response can turn a reactive response into a thoughtful contribution that strengthens, rather than strains, our shared community.

A Shared Commitment

We want this space to be welcoming, faithful, and constructive. Respectful dialogue is a shared responsibility. When we speak with grace, listen with care, and engage with humility, we help create a community that reflects Christ’s love and builds up the body of Christ in meaningful ways. If you have any questions about how we moderate Network content, please take a look at our community guidelines. It can also be helpful to have the Network guidelines pulled up while you're writing your blog post or your comment - take a quick look through the guidelines before you post, and revise your writing on the guidelines we all work to uphold.